Dating and courtship in modern society
On the other hand, the Filipino man fears rejection by a woman and would like to avoid losing face and embarrassment.This teasing phase actually helps in circumventing such an embarrassing predicament because formal courtship has not yet officially started.Furthermore, this "testing phase" also helps a man who could be "torpe", a Filipino term for a suitor who is shy, "stupid", and feels cowardly, and is innocent and naïve in how to court a woman.However, this type of admirer could overcome his shyness and naivety by asking for the help of a "tulay" (Filipino for "Bridge", whose role is similar to that of the Wingman in Western Cultures), typically a mutual friend of both the suitor and the admired, or a close friend of both families.Through this "human-bridge", the bachelor can also ask permission to visit the woman at home from the bachelorette's father.As a norm, the couple will not be left alone with each other during this first home visit, because formal introductions to family members are done, which may be performed by the "tulay". During this preliminary evaluation period, the Filipino woman will either deny her feelings (or the absence of feelings for the suitor) and avoids her admirer, or does not become angry because of the teasing and encourages the suitor instead.The suitor stops the courtship if he is quite sure that the woman does not reciprocate.
The serious suitor or boyfriend visits the family of the woman he admires/courts or girlfriend in order to formally introduce himself, particularly to the lady's parents.
Bringing gifts or pasalubong The actual boyfriend-girlfriend relationship may also result from such formal visits.
Although having a series of friendly dates is the normal starting point in the Filipino way of courting, this may also begin through the process of "teasing", a process of "pairing off" a potential teenage or adult couple.
The teasing is done by peers or friends of the couple being matched.
The teasing practice assists in discerning the actual feelings of the male and the female involved.
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Traditionally, a Filipino woman is "shy and secretive" about her feelings for a suitor.